Mom giving her son pocket money so he can take her on dates sparks debate about toxic 'boy moms'

While the term “new mom” may seem harmless, some influencers say it means more than just a label for a mother raising sons – experts warn it could lead to toxic family dynamics.

While it seems harmless – and in some cases it is – other videos show mothers outwardly expressing their preference for their sons over their daughters, with some critics even accusing them of “emotional incest.”

Trending online “young mom” videos vary: some moms describe raising a son as the longest separation of their lives, others criticize their son's future spouse for everything from cooking to cleaning — while their sons are still babies.

In a now-deleted TikTok posted in June, creator Avery Woods explained that her “son has her heart and soul.”

Recently, creator Mellissa went viral after sharing that she regularly has “date nights” with her 12-year-old son to teach him how to interact with women

“I'm obviously obsessed with my Stevie Lee (my daughter), she's just the greatest little girl in the world,” the mother assured viewers.

“All my life I've always wanted to be a young mother,” she gushed.

Recently, creator Mellissa went viral after sharing that she regularly has “date nights” with her 12-year-old son to teach him how to interact with women.

“GRWM (Get ready with me) for a date with my boy,” Melissa captioned her video, which she posted to Instagram.

“Basically, you give them an allowance ($50) and they take you out on a date,” she explained.

“The idea is to prepare them on how to take a girl on a date in the future so that when the time comes they aren't completely lost,” she continued.

“So you help them plan and execute a date and teach them basic etiquette and manners.”

She added: “It's really nice because we can spend thoughtful and intentional time together – but the catch is that I make him plan it.”

However, viewers were divided on whether it was cute or perhaps a little scary.

While some users found it charming, others felt that it could pose problems in the future as the son tries to build his own relationships and could create unnecessary problems for everyone involved later in life.

Melissa said: “The idea is to prepare them on how to take a girl on a date in the future so they aren't completely lost when the time comes.”

While it seems harmless – and in some cases it is – other videos show mothers outwardly expressing their preference for their sons over their daughters, with some even accusing them of emotional incest

“This will end up leading to a strange Freudian codependency if I do this.” A boy's father should teach him how to interact with women, perhaps with some help from his mother, but definitely not by him always takes his mother out on dates…” one user commented.

However, others defended the mother's idea, saying: “Someone's daughter will be very grateful to you for doing this.”

“On the surface it doesn’t seem to be a problem; “It's simply a way to identify and connect with other mothers who have sons and everything that entails,” explained Psychology Today author Sylvia L. Mikucki-Enyart Ph.D. , in a first person post.

“However, if you dig deeper, you find aspects of #boymom culture that are unfortunately harmful and create the conditions for dysfunctional family relationships.”

Sylvia said it could create a toxic family environment and create a “disturbing” family dynamic for mothers, their adult sons and future partners.

Sylvia said there are three reasons why the mother-son relationship could become toxic.

According to Sylvia, when a mother describes her son's moving out or marriage as a “breakup,” she sees her sons taking on the role of a romantic partner rather than the role of a child.

Second, she said, “Viewing a daughter-in-law as the 'other woman' automatically creates negative expectations for the daughter-in-law from the start.”

And third, “positioning sons as romantic partners puts undue pressure on them to prioritize their mothers over their wives.”

To combat this, Sylvia suggests viewing your daughter-in-law as an asset to your family rather than competition and prioritizing building a relationship with her.